From the moment I entered into motherhood I felt there were things we were not allowed to talk about. When I became a mother I had to climb out of the trenches of an unforeseen birth trauma and turned to social media to try and find another mother who felt the way I did. A mother who looks down at her baby and knows she loves them with all her heart, yet her heart feels hollow and broken. A mother who dreamed of breastfeeding her baby the entire pregnancy, but now suffers through every feed and feels resentment each time her baby cries for milk. A mother who knows she should feel gratitude for everything she has, but also feels buried under the endless emotions and exhaustion. I so badly wanted to speak out about this all as I was living it, but these truths made me feel guilty and full of shame. I thought I was the only one who felt this way and so at first I stayed silent at home, with friends, and on social media.
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Motherhood is multifaceted, yet only a speck of it is revealed, discussed and broadcasted. I am tired of this and have been tired of not seeing honest and real motherhood shared more frequently. What am I afraid of? What are we all so afraid of by sharing the real moments with the perfect ones as a parent? Well, after my second birth, a more seasoned mother now, a more honest one with myself, I began to share and open up. I was no longer afraid of exposing the parts of motherhood that made me feel alone. Then suddenly something incredible happened the more I shared and posted. Other mothers, the ones I had searched for during my early days in motherhood commented and messaged me. They said they felt this way too, they said they finally felt seen, and they said this is what we all needed to start to talk about. From then on, I have continued to stay open and talk about all sides of motherhood, and now through my love of writing I am thrilled to bring you the Dear Mama Letters.
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The Dear Mama Letters is a weekly newsletter sent out to rewrite the mother story in one email to your inbox at a time. I focus the letters on the topics we too often as mothers brush over such as guilt, exhaustion, birth and motherhood trauma, self-love and balance, just to name a few. I promise to be an open book and tell it like it is. I know first-hand the more I speak my truths about motherhood the more I can connect with other mothers, and in turn allow them to feel connected.
Motherhood is a battlefield. Let's not enter it alone.
I hope you will join us.
Rewriting the mother story one letter at a time.